The Happiest Parts Of Our Lives
by sweet-and-simple
Summary: Friendship and love could change anyone. That had only been half the reason why she had dumped a cyndaquil on her arsonphobic big brother's lap, though. PokemonXHuman, slash, maleXmale, etc...
1. Cyndaquil the Invader

It had taken two months, a small fortune in fire retardant clothes, fire retardant spray, fire extinguishers, new smoke detectors, a sprinkler system, three separate hoses, an up-to-date alarm system, and her twenty-third birthday wish to convince her arsonphobic older brother Ken to adopt her cyndaquil.

Now everyone's most likely wondering who would go through so much trouble to get rid of a fire-type pokémon that would be, no doubt, a great asset to a trainer once it evolved into a typhlosion. Well, she liked her water-types, and their father was a total and complete _ass_, trying to convince her to follow in _his_ footsteps, telling her that _fire_ was the way to go as he sneered at his one and only son that broke into a cold sweat whenever he saw a lighter clicking to life, telling her that water was a _weak_ type, and that she was best doing what he had begun… till he had a son.

Their dad had even gone far enough to take her squirtle and try to trade it off for a charmander! If it hadn't been for her brother, she would never have seen Aqua again. Not that their dad hadn't punished him for having the audacity to take the pokéball from his hands and toss it back at her, telling her to run and hide it.

No, he had carried the bruises of that experience for two weeks afterwards, and she knew that she would never be able to repay him for that.

But that was beside the point.

On her twenty-_second_ birthday, far away from home, living next door to her beloved big brother, who showed up at the party but their dad? And, oh, look, he had a pokéball. A strong pokémon, you say? Let me guess, it's a…

Fire-type.

She didn't have anything against the cyndaquil, even admitting to herself that the little guy was cute, but he just wouldn't fit in with her. She knew there would be advantages to having a fire-type when she only had water-types, but even that stroke of knowledge was not enough to make it feel right to take the cyndaquil on adventures with her.

He was so… fiery.

Her brother, on the other hand, could use some companionship. He had grown up with the bone-deep resolve to be absolutely nothing like their dad, and, as soon as he had been able to, he had gotten into college and worked especially hard to become a grade school teacher where he could teach young, impressionable children the joys of reading and writing.

She had gone to his class once, a few months back, and had been completely awed by how much the children adored him, hanging onto his every word. She had never _seen_ so many kids stay behind after class before of their own free will! She hadn't even thought it possible. When she had been in grade school, the last bell had been the sweetest sound in the world.

His pupils aside, she never saw him mingle with other people. Her visits were the only ones made to his small house, and she made sure to visit at _least_ three times a week when she was home, but, sometimes, she _wasn't_. She could be gone for months at a time, off training water pokémon and consulting with nurse Joys and other trainers about how best to treat their water-types.

So, her reasoning for pushing the little pokémon on him had come with a variety of reasons, aside from being selfish.

It was just more difficult to do so because, again, Ken, her big brother who had taken hit after hit from their dad, who had been bullied all throughout middle and high school for being a scrawny nerd and had never once shed a tear or begged for mercy, had a terrible, irrational fear of fire.

Her mother, when she had been alive, had once told her the story of how their dad had lit a match too close to Ken's face, trying to make it sound like an accident, covering for the man she had loved with all her heart, but they both knew the truth. Their dad didn't smoke, and nothing he ever did was an 'accident'.

It had explained the small burn on her big brother's cheek, but he had only been a few months old at the time and she couldn't help think that there was no way he still remembered that. Then again, maybe it wasn't the last time their dad got too close to him with a match.

She had never asked and he had never told, continuing to wear his button-downs with the collars high and the sleeves never rolled up.

The more she thought about it, the guiltier she felt.

Eventually, though, especially after she told him her wish that the cyndaquil would go to a nice, warm home somewhere very nearby with someone she trusted with all her heart so that she would know he was safe and cared for… and, oh, that someone was him –

He had given in, looking pale and shaky all the while, but she had told herself, repeatedly, that he would be okay. That he had always been brave and that he would defeat his fears. If he didn't, she had told herself that she would take the cyndaquil back. She had to go a half-year trip to the Cinnibar Islands, which, she thought was more than enough time for him to decide if he could handle his new friend or not.

All the while, she would look for potential adopters… just in case. She had even given him permission to put the cyndaquil in the nearest adoption center if he couldn't wait till she got back, but both options were last resorts.

Even if she wasn't into fire-types, and it had been their dad to give her the cyndaquil, it had still been given to her and she didn't want anything bad to happen to it.

She had stayed in his house with him for two days first, helping to calm him down from full-blown panic attacks till he could see the cyndaquil out of the corner of his eye and not immediately start hyperventilating. She felt pretty good that, by the second night, the cyndaquil had seemingly already attached itself to its new home, though his new master's fear seemed to also make it afraid.

"You're going to have to calm down around it if you want it to calm down," she had told her big brother. "I love you, big brother. Be safe." And then, heart heavy and mind full of all the things that could go wrong, she left.

And, now, she was back, and her hands were shaking as she ignored her own home and swung open her big brother's front door, knowing from experience it wouldn't be locked.

"I'm home!" she cried out with fake joy, hardly able to breathe. For the first three months, she and Ken had kept in good contact over the phone and he had told her that maybe, _just maybe_, he could get used to the fire-type, though he was still admittedly scared. Then, nothing. She hadn't been able to get a hold of him and, when she had called up the neighbor on the other side of him to please, please, _please_ check up on him, the neighbor had said that no one was apparently home.

She ran through the living room, noted the two scorch marks in one corner of the room just above a small nest of blankets, and crashed into the kitchen where a few glass ornaments that had been there before her trip were now missing. Still no sign of her big brother and she was _really_ starting to hate herself for not doing something else with the cyndaquil.

Then, unexpectedly, she heard a very faint noise, so _very_ faint, and she stopped breathing, listening… Listening.

It happened again, just a little bit louder, and her heart squeezed. That was her big brother! That was her big brother… chuckling?

She raced up the stairs, taking them two by two as everyone in her family seemed gifted with incredibly long legs, and all but threw herself against Ken's bedroom door.

Shoving it in, she took in the scene before her with wild, worried eyes.

Ken's wooden dresser was to one side of his closet while a set of hanging hooks were on the other, one item per each hook, three hooks per each bar, four different bars, and the bedside table was unexpectedly missing a leg, using a long wooden block as a replacement, while the lamp that had been on top of it was strangely missing. The glossy oak floor had a few burn holes in it that she didn't remember it having and there was a faint, smoky smell that reminded her of their dad.

The bed, however, was in one piece, though the bed set was different. Her big brother's favorite three-sheet set with the white quilt had been replaced with a blue comforter while the pillow casings were a deep, passionate red.

Upon closer inspection, she realized that, while the bed seemed to have improved, the footrest had gained some deep scars and the headrest looked as if something had been gnawing on it.

And then there was her big brother, sitting in the center of his bed with magicarp jerky dangling from his fingertips.

"You're back early," was the first thing he said, as if he didn't realize just how stressed out she was, and the cyndaquil that had startled at her abrupt entrance went back to eyeballing the jerky hungrily from its sitting position against the footrest.

It was the first time in her life she had ever considered choking her big brother to death.

"I see you two are getting along," she heard her voice say, though what was going through her mind went above and beyond inappropriate for young ears and she decided that cyndaquils counted in that respect. "So, uh, how's that arsonphobia going?"

He looked from her to the cyndaquil. "I'm still afraid, but…" He brought the jerky closer and the cyndaquil nabbed at it, chowing it down and making it disappear before she could even blink. With a heart-warming chuckle, he ran his hand down the pokémon's back, over the enlarged, modified, fire-spewing pores that he should have been terrified of. "Not of him," he finished lightly. "I was afraid of him but then it was so ridiculous because he's so… so… Well, look at him, Fi."

"He can still cause a lot of damage," she said before she could stop herself, and instantly hated herself for it. Who was she to make him feel uncomfortable?

He shook his head, smiling. "Not to me. I don't think Haward can hurt me."

Haward. He _would_ pick a geeky name like that. It made her shudder. All of her pokémon had _cool_ names – like Aqua and Dale and Ken…

Yeah, she named her quagsire after her big brother. It had been unavoidable, really.

She brushed it off, though. "So it's a boy?"

"Yeah. Haward's a boy."

She leered at him. "How'd you figure that out?"

His returning glance was equally mischievous. "Nurse Joy told me."

She paused, not sure if they were playing or not. "Why was Nurse Joy here…?" Did something happen that she didn't know about?

"She wasn't here."

"Oh."

"We were at the hospital."

"_Why_?"

He stroked Haward's head, earning an affectionate lick on the wrist. "Did you know that fire-types are very perceptible to colds that can quickly develop into hypothermia if not instantly taken care of?"

"Well… I guess that might be common knowledge. They are _fire_-types."

He looked suddenly sheepish. "Did you know you're not supposed to give fire-types baths?"

She held up both hands, one for silence and the other to signify that she had retreated deep into her mind where a backup source of patience lied for moments like these. "I'm not sure whether or not to be proud that you managed to get a fire-type into water without being burned to a crisp, even prouder that you came over your fear of being burned to a crisp to do so, or if I should just flip out on you and have your teaching license revoked." She rubbed her temples as he looked dejectedly away. "I suppose, though, that if it brought you two closer together and you know better now, that I can forgive it. I mean, not all fire-type pokémon have their fires extinguished in water and don't survive. Some fire-type pokémon even enjoy a sauna or two every once in awhile. Of course, they like their water blistering hot, and I'm _sure_ you made the bath really, really hot, _right_?"

Because her big brother was a freak who liked his waters fairly cool no matter the time of year, as if he was even afraid of catching fire in the shower.

His greater look of guilt let her know that Haward's bath hadn't been warm at all.

Haward, however, as this conversation was going on, seemed to get agitated. Either he didn't like the tone of her voice, how she stood there, or how his master was reacting to her, because, all of a sudden, the only noise in the room was the squeaky, enraged roars of a tiny pokémon who flared his black flames and tried to glare at her.

Haward stood on his back legs, front legs spread open, and bared his tiny undeveloped teeth at her.

She had studied enough pokémon, though none of them fire-type, to know that Haward had claimed this room as his territory and, as a visitor, she was now being told, none too kindly, to get out before he attacked. He was trying to look intimidating, larger than he was, and she honestly thought she was going to have to kick the tiny little thing out the window for his fire display.

A look at Ken, however, and she was shell shocked.

He didn't back away. He didn't start hyperventilating either. He just chuckled, as if Haward's display of dominance was _cute_ to him, and put his hand on Haward's back, right over the jetting flames.

He didn't burn.

She knew what that meant: fire-type pokémon could, in essence, put their mark on a few special people that somehow altered _something_ so that those few special people weren't burned by their flames.

And Ken wasn't burning.

She had no doubt, though, that if she were to do the same thing, it would hurt like nothing else in the world could, and she took a careful two steps back. "You know what? Whatever you two did, it worked out great."

She felt a sense of relief that touched her to her innermost core. Her big brother had a companion now, a very loyal one by the looks of it, and he was happy. That was all that mattered to her, that he was truly and altogether _happy_.

"Any plans now?" she asked, not wanting to leave yet. After twenty-three years of watching her big brother freeze with terror at the sight of flames, even unable to watch the fireworks go off every New Year's, this was like a _whoa_ moment. Nothing had ever mattered before this.

"I want to bring him into class so that the children can see him."

"Classroom pet?"

"Some of their families don't have any pokémon," he reasoned factually. "I want them to have that experience."

"Haward, the teacher's pet." She rolled her eyes and grinned. "It fits perfectly."

Haward, seeing that the atmosphere had calmed, also calmed. The flames extinguished themselves and he settled back into his master's hand, making small, joyful sounds as he wiggled his small feet. Ken dropped another piece of jerky into his mouth and Haward squealed with glee.

Feeling better about having left the cyndaquil with him now, she pushed off the door and left them alone. "See you later, big brother!"

He called back a brief farewell.

At the front door, she heard him laugh and her chest tightened inexplicably.

The last time she had heard him laugh, it had been with relief at his graduation when she had told him that their dad wasn't coming. Holding the sound close to her heart, she left her big brother's house and returned to her own.

He would be okay now. That, she knew for a fact.

:::

She walked through her big brother's front door, took in the living room with its one missing makeshift nest in the corner, and smirked.

Haward had won out in the end. Of course, her big brother had only reluctantly told her that Haward often 'somehow' found a way into his room at night and slept under the covers with him. Ken had been 'trying', apparently, to break him of the habit and keeping him to his own nest.

Ken, apparently, didn't have the resolve that Haward did, and she hummed happily to herself all the way up the stairs to her big brother's bedroom.

The sight before her startled her.

"Big brother… What are you doing?"

He waved her away as if she was a pesky fly. "Ssshhh…" His eyes were on Haward, watching him expectantly.

Haward had gone very still upon her entrance, looking wildly between her and his master. Slowly, as if unnerved by her presence, he stuttered.

"It's okay," Ken crooned to him, petting a hand over his long head. "You're doing great, it's okay, don't be afraid…"

She studied the book placed in front of Ken, a large, red A printed on one page and an equally large blue B on the opposing page. "Please tell me you've forgotten your ABC's," she said exasperatedly.

He gave her a dark look through his reading glasses that told her he did not find her the least beast funny.

"Cynd… Nd… Nd!" Haward flapped his upper legs like a bird. "Nd!"

Ken exaggerated the motion of his lips as he responded back, "B."

"Nd!"

"B."

"D!"

"He seems a little ahead of you," she drawled unhelpfully.

Her big brother made another swatting motion. "B," he said again, softly, and Haward looked at him as if he was causing him great pain. Ken sighed and leaned back. A piece of jerky appeared in his hand and Haward's expression changed immediately to joy.

She coughed into her hand as Haward gobbled the piece up. "Whipped."

Ken frowned at her. "Any good teacher knows to reward a hardworking student." He shifted a little uncomfortably. "Even if said hardworking student isn't getting good grades."

"Ouch, Mr. Coalson."

"He's learning fast, though," he stated, voice full of conviction. "He understands most of what I say to him."

"So you're teaching him how to understand human speech?" That wasn't too farfetched. A fair number of trainers did that. Some pokémon already understood fragments of human speech, possibly due to the commands they obeyed. There were even other pokémon, like the lapras, that completely understood human speech.

"First, understanding," Ken whispered excitedly. "Then, practice. I plan on having him reading before I die of old age. Well, that _was_ the plan. But, like I was saying, he's a fast learner, so he might be reading small children's stories by the time I hit fifty…"

"Let's not get our hopes up," she countered dryly.

It didn't even surprise her that her big brother was doing this. It wouldn't be _impossible_ to do, per say. She heard tales of a Team Rock pokémon that could fluently speak, read, and understand English. Though that had been a meowth and their mouths and tongues were better formed to articulate the human dialect. She wasn't sure if it came down to brain capacities on this one, but she was thinking that the cyndaquil didn't exactly have the brain cells to learn such a complicated language.

She decided to just leave it to her brother. If he could do it, then he could do it. If he couldn't… Well, he would say to his grave that he had tried and she knew him well enough to know without a doubt that he would always treat Haward like a little genius.

Ken gave her another sour look before putting his complete attention on Haward. Under his master's kind, green gaze, Haward stood proudly on his hind legs and puffed out his chest.

"B," Ken articulated.

"D!" Haward shouted happily back.

"Why are you here?" Ken asked abruptly, turning to her. "Not that I don't enjoy your visits…"

She held up her hands in defeat. "I just wanted to come by and say 'I love you'. And, whatever you want to do, I'm behind you one hundred percent of the way. If you want, I'll even try to teach him a few words."

What had been hope developing in his eyes quickly turned to suspicion. "Oh, really? What words would those be?"

He wisely put his hands over Haward's ear holes as she opened her mouth and a pile of filth came out, enough to make a machomp blush.

"_Thank you_, Fi, but I think we're good. Maybe you could go teach that foul language to your own pokémon."

"Are you suggesting that I teach my pokémon how to cuss?"

"If that will keep you from teaching Haward, then, yes. I'm sure, with you as their master, they wouldn't mind."

"You're cold, big brother. So cold." She came into the room, paused as Haward swung his head around to pin her down with a glare that was almost too cute to not smile at, and then continued to sit by her big brother's side.

With no respect for him and his big book of letters, she swung the pages till she came to the one letter she knew she could teach the cyndaquil, ignoring her brother's sulky presence.

And it wasn't D.

She traced the four lines that made the green letter, doing it until Haward curiously began tracing it himself. "K," she pronounced. Then, when Haward looked up at her, she pointed at Ken. "K."

Haward's eyes lit up like Christmas had just come to town. "Quil… Q-quil!"

"You just skipped a part of the alphabet. He can't learn like that, Fi, that just isn't _ethical_…"

"Shush, big brother. Wait for it."

Three minutes in, after many embarrassing attempts, Haward looked up at her big brother with an air around him of complete and utter determination. "K!"

"You might want to give him that jerky now," she crooned into her big brother's ear, gently snapped his mouth shut for him. "You're right. Hard work _does_ deserve a treat." Before he could deny her, she grabbed a piece for herself and flounced off his bed. "I love you, big brother."

And, with that, she left.

At the front door, she paused, as had become customary for her to do, and she waited.

From above, there was another shout of "K!".

Then, unbelievably, gentle male laughter.

A single tear trickled down her smiling face. He would never laugh in front of her, but, just the sound of his happiness was enough for her. Haward made him happy.

It made her a little bit angry, considering where Haward had come from, meaning that, in some distant way, she owed her big brother's happiness to the man who had spent most of their lives making her big brother as _un_happy as possible. Then again, maybe it was karma.

She chose not to think about it, lest it give her a headache, and quietly went back to her own home.

She was thinking about teaching Aqua a few curse words…

:::

She had to go out of town for three weeks to consult with a business friend of hers about a migration of gyrados.

When she came back, Haward met her at the door, chirping the ABC's as he closed the door behind her. She watched him in complete awe.

He was wearing the tiniest blue apron she had ever seen and he waddled off on all fours, careful not to trip on the apron, to the kitchen where she could hear her big brother humming to himself. It was a habit they both had, hers when she was excited and his when he was cooking.

She followed Haward and quietly sat down at the dining table, not alerting her big brother of her presence and Haward not thinking to either. Haward had a staircase of pulled-out drawers that he used to climb onto the counter with and, with a novice's inexperience but desire to learn, began patting at some sort of dough, trying to smooth out bumps while accidentally creating tears.

Ken chuckled as he saw this. "Haward, maybe you should try the cookie cutter…" he turned and saw her out of the corner of his eye. Startled, he jumped. "Arceus, Fi! When did you get here?"

She waved her hand dismissively. "Long enough, big brother. Long enough." She smiled as she took in the sight of him, mousy brown hair with smears of white flour in it, a streak of the same white on his clean cheek, apron decorated yellow and white with different sorts of stains.

She grinned deviously. "Long enough to know that you like pink, anyway."

Ken looked down, saw the color of his apron, the _Kiss the Cook_ slogan across the breast of it with the thick, red pursed lips at the end of it, and flushed red. "It was a gift," he stated, glaring at her and daring her not to believe him.

"The kids?" she guessed. Her smile grew at his curt nod. "They _would_ get you that apron. Were they hoping you would cook in the classroom?"

"One of them did suggest bringing an EasyBake Oven."

"None of them thought of just using Haward to heat something up?"

He shifted on his feet. "I told them it would create too much smoke."

"Aaaah…" She crossed one leg over the other and leaned back against the table. Haward, despite his master's attempt to get him to stop, was still trying to smooth out the dough to perfection. She could hear the little cyndaquil still tweeting the ABC's to himself, over and over again, till all she could see in her mind was that damn letter book. "You know, I'm just going to say what I came here to say: I'm home, big brother. I love you, big brother. And, I recently met someone."

Ken raised a brow and a slow, easy smile curled his lips. "Oh, really? Do I get to beat someone up for thinking they're good enough for my little sister?"

It was her turn to laugh. "No, not _that_ kind of 'met someone'. I mean, I met a trainer who would like to train Haward."

The atmosphere was suddenly very awkward.

"He doesn't want to _take_ Haward," she clarified at his pained expression. "He's just always wanted to work with a cyndaquil or one of its evolutions. They are aggressive pokémon, big brother, if Haward trained, he would less of a danger to your house and…" remembering what he had said about Haward never harming him, she finished strongly, "your students."

The pain turned to speculation. He crouched down so he was level to Haward, who looked up from his studious task to stare back at his master.

"Would you like that, Haward? To train your powers and become a strong fighter?"

"He doesn't _have_ to be a fighter," she interrupted. "He can stay here with you, learn how to understand, speak, read, cook, and whatever. It would just be best if he knew how to work his energy as time progresses.

He seemed relieved at that.

Haward looked from her to him and then back again. "… Ken?", he asked, sending her for a loop.

"He just said your name," she said dumbly.

"I know," Ken answered with a hint of bravado. "Your name was next in case there was an emergency." He took Haward in his arms and held him to his chest. "It's up to you, Haward. No matter what, you'll still be here with me, okay?"

Haward sighed, possibly because he understood and was relieved, or maybe because the close contact with his master put him at ease. "A, B, C, D, E…"

Ken laughed, and it was magical to watch his spring green eyes sparkle and his mouth open into a happy smile and he almost _glowed_ as he laughed.

She found herself laughing too, though she had no clue why. Ken just had that ability.

"You have a very busy schedule ahead of you, Haward," Ken announced. "Between school and sports, you'll never stay up late again."

"I don't know," she said with heavy doubt and a big grin. "I managed pretty easily."

His dark look made her laugh again.

Arceus, she loved her big brother.


	2. Haward the Quilava

She had no clue how she was going to explain this to Ken.

Well, it wasn't necessarily a _bad_ thing. But he most likely wouldn't be happy. Haward wasn't even happy about it! And he had learned enough English to vocalize such, though he was having a new sort of difficulty with it at the moment.

Nonetheless, the two or three curses she had managed to teach him behind her big brother's back were discernable as he stared out of the back seat window of her small, modern car. There was frustration in his red eyes, a glower permanently stamped into his features.

She was so doomed.

It hadn't even been her fault, though! It wasn't like she _told_ her friend to do this… She hadn't even known that he could! It had never occurred to her that he had such a thing, and, even if she had known, she would have never thought that he would use it on a pokémon not his own.

She had given Ken her friend's phone number and address. Ken had even visited the gym he used a few every other session he had with Haward just to make sure that Haward was being treated well by the trainer.

She would tell Ken the truth, step to the side, and let him kill the trainer instead of the messenger.

Because this was _definitely_ not her fault.

She looked into the rearview mirror and studied Haward, happy that, even though he was angry, at least he wasn't lighting up. His muzzle was shorter, and he was taller, though she wouldn't exactly say that he was _tall_. His eyes were larger, more mature, and his limbs weren't so pudgy.

She had seen him with his flames going on and, she had to admit, he looked more like a punk kid now than anything else. The thought almost brought a smile to her lips.

Then she remembered Ken.

Oh, yeah, she was so dead, messenger or not. "I'm going to guess that you don't want to go back for any training, huh?"

Haward stayed disdainfully quiet. The silent treatment was something he had learned from Ken.

Already feeling guilty, she accepted it.

With a deep breath, she slowed the car and slid into her parking slot. Before she could even turn off the engine, Haward had leaped out of the back seat and was racing for his front door.

He was eager to have her killed, she thought dully to herself as she took the keys out of the ignition and followed him, a sense of overwhelming dread dragging her shoulders down.

She heard the yell of surprise first.

Then, an instant later, a wild-eyed Ken stood in the doorway, blocking her way in. "Why is Haward evolved?"

"Well, you remember Derek, right? Haward's trainer and all? The one I told you was a good guy and you believed me?"

He slowly nodded his head, looking less and less pleased.

"He kind of… had a fire stone hanging around, I guess, and he, um, he wanted to…"

"Fi."

"Yes, big brother?"

"If you want to live, you'll go to your own house for a few hours. Haward and I need to decide what to do next."

She wanted to ask what they could possibly do. Short of a miracle or an everstone, there was nothing they _could_ do.

Obediently, though, she went back to her own house and waited, without rest, for the next morning.

Exhausted, she dragged herself back to her brother's house at four in the morning, uncaring if he and Haward were sleeping or not.

Nonetheless, the door opened for her. Her big brother stood in the doorway, looking calmer, as if he had gotten a full night of rest, and stepped aside so she could come in.

"Pokémon who go under 'forced' evolutions usually have more difficulty learning new attacks or leveling up," he said in his best teaching voice, as if this wasn't something she already knew as a trainer. "Since I don't mind Haward at whatever stage of evolution he wants to be at and I don't need him to be a fighter either, we've agreed to just let what happen not bother us. If anything, it's made life easier for us now that he isn't so small, but isn't too big either."

He was rambling to her, as if he knew he had made her feel guilty and didn't want her to feel that way.

"What if it turns out that he can learn more moves?" she said, rather stupidly, and wished she could learn to keep her mouth shut.

Ken sighed. "Then he can learn more moves. But Derek is not allowed back into the picture. The next thing we know, he'll be using another evolutionary stone on him to turn him into a typhlosion!"

She nodded eagerly. "Okay, no more Derek."

Haward padded into the room on all four, yawning. He saw her and tried for a half-smile, though it looked more intimidating now than when he had been a cyndaquil. "Hi, Fi."

"Hey, Haward. No hard feelings, right?"

He thought about it for a long moment before he sat down and shook his head. "It surprised us both when he used the stone. You wouldn't have been able to stop it."

"Thanks, Haward." She crouched down in front of him and held out a fist. "Pound it."

He did and they both grinned.

"Now, could you please go?" Ken asked. "It's a Saturday today and I want to get in all the sleep I can."

"Sure thing. Yeah, you guys tuck yourselves in and I'll, uh, do the same."

She left, feeling better but not completely forgiven.

She had been the one to first suggest Ken get Haward trained. Haward wouldn't have been forced to evolve before his time if it hadn't been for her introducing Derek into their lives.

She got into her car.

It was the perfect time to visit the trainer. Too early for anyone to see her go in and too late for anyone to care on her way out.

:::

She noticed something throughout the next year and a half.

Ken and Haward were really, _really_ good friends, weren't they? She had walked in on them grooming each other before, though their methods were different. Ken had a soft brush and a shedding brush that he used on Haward and Haward used his claws to straighten out Ken's short brown locks.

Not just that, but they _did_ sleep together.

And then there was the fact that they ate together. Usually, they made the meals together. Sometimes, though, Ken would cook something especially for Haward. Other times, Haward would put his meager, but growing, skills in the kitchen to use and make something for Haward to eat.

They always seemed to be making each other's lunches for school. The one time she went to Ken's class on a visitor's pass, she saw them work the kids like magicians. Ken could handle his awestruck class easily enough by himself, but, with his talking quilava at his side, reading alongside his students, it _really_ got the little kiddies into doing their assignments.

During recess, when the children would try to tug Ken one way and the other at the same time, Haward would charge in to distract them, knowing that Ken didn't have it in him to say no to any child. He managed to thin the crowd of children down by suggesting they play a ball game. Most of the boys and some girls chased after him as he stayed just out of reach, aiming for a soccer ball left out in the small field beside the playground.

By the time the school day ended, Ken was two stress levels less than he had been before Haward and the quilava had to turn down two children asking him to teach their younger siblings how to talk like normal people.

And then, at night, and she had only seen this routine once, completely by accident, Haward and Ken would retreat to the bathroom and, while Ken was in the bath, Haward would use a damp, hot sponge to clean himself.

That had been embarrassing to walk in on, but interesting to learn nonetheless.

They brushed their teeth together, each got a glass of water for the night (Haward's with a straw), and settled down on opposite sides of the bed. Usually, by this time, if she wasn't already gone, her big brother would kindly excuse her and she would leave.

By morning, though, she was back, and she got to see how they had switched positions in their sleep firsthand.

Sometimes, the quilava would be spilled across Ken's chest. Other times, Haward would somehow be on the very edge of the bed while Ken would be halfway to him as if, in his sleep, he still knew Haward was heading towards danger.

There were fewer times, though, that she walked in on and felt her heart squeeze with the sort of pain that felt pretty good.

Sometimes, she would hear Ken whimpering before she even reached the bedroom. And then, by the time she reached his door and opened it a crack, his fear would have already been wiped away, and she would be left with the sight of Haward hugging Ken's head to his small body, growling low in his sleep as if to ward off any opponents seeking to hurt his master.

It always managed to calm Ken down, somehow, when Haward did that.

Whether they knew or not what they did in their sleep, she never brought it up, neither did they, and they all lived with their decision to stay quiet about sleeping positions and bed buddies.

Nonetheless, she had been thinking of their friendship a lot lately, trying to estimate what level this would put them at. Friendship affected a pokémon's evolution – how much they loved their master, how well cared for they were… It wasn't the same as leveling up due to battle experience, and with Haward's one force evolution, it wasn't likely for him to level up from friendship, or 'Happiness', alone.

She had been hoping for it, though. Typhlosion's were big beasts and Ken could use something bigger to cuddle up to in his sleep.

Two days before Christmas, she was sitting next Haward and the collection of cookie cutters he had gotten the year before as he decorated chocolate chip cookies to look like stantlers, articuno, and cubchoos.

"Hey, Haward, do you… want to evolve into a typhlosion?" She raised a curious, innocent brow.

Haward paused, stared at his latest creation, and carefully put his stantler-shaped cookie cutter to the side. "If I were a typhlosion, I would be too strong," he answered mysteriously.

"What do you mean, too strong?"

He stayed stubbornly quiet.

"It's okay, you can tell me. Big brother's at the store, if that's what you're worried about." She smiled. "I can keep a secret."

His chest moved rapidly up and down and she felt fear for a moment, thinking he had adapted her big brother's anxiety attacks.

"Do you remember summer when your vaporeon went into heat?" he said in a sudden rush.

She had to sit there for a moment, trying to sort out his words, before she nodded her head, feeling not so sure about wanting to know his reasoning now if _that_ was his opening line. "Yes… It was a difficult time for my pokémon."

They were back at her home at the moment, free to do as they pleased. She had gotten a large plastic swimming pool to fit in the basement a few winters back and, if they weren't up for a swim, she had left pokésnacks on the living room table. If they weren't up for that either, they were always welcome to follow her to her big brother's.

However, ever since Haward moved in, her water pokémon had been less certain about visiting. She was slightly disappointed in them for it, but understood nonetheless. When they were home, confrontation was the last thing they wanted, and her water pokémon hadn't known enough good fire pokémon in their time to see Haward as a friend.

That aside, she did remember Vy going into heat. It had been… terrible. Two of her stronger male pokémon, her blastoise and marshtop, had continuously broken out of their pokéballs to get at her. It got to the point where she had keep _Vy_ in her pokéball. Somehow, though, she was still pregnant. She had birthed twin eggs and they were due to hatch in early spring.

She eyeballed Haward suspiciously. "You wouldn't happen to be the dad, would you?"

He shook his head, the insides of his ears blushing as well as his nose. "No… But I know who is."

She knew she wasn't going to like this, but… "Would you mind telling me who, then?"

"It was your quagsire… K-Ken."

That thickheaded, horny little – …

She would deal with him later. "Okay. Thank you for telling me that… But what does this have to do with anything?"

"They, they looked like they were having a lot of f-fun…" Something unexpectedly hot came into his eyes. Discreetly, he shifted his apron over his lap.

Horrified, she put a hand over her face and leaned into it. "O…kay… Thank you for telling me that. Are you saying that, if you were a typhlosion, you would be scared of mating?"

As soon as the lust had come, it was gone. Haward the quilava drooped into his seat. "Yeah."

"There's no reason to be scared, Haward! There are plenty of pokémon girls out there who would be able to take… whatever you think you can dish out." She told herself she had had more embarrassing conversations with her friends.

Somehow, though, she knew that wasn't true. Haward was still decently young in pokémon years, though older than his living years would hint at.

"I don't… _want_ any pokémon girls, though."

"… Okay, listen, I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I've seen Vy handle some big pokémon in her time… She's experienced." More experienced than she would have liked. How did her pokémon always end up getting more action than her?

"I don't want Vy either."

She tried to make sense of what he was saying… "Do you want… Ken? Whoa, I didn't know pokémon could swing that way… But it's okay! There's nothing wrong with it, Haward. I did a little 'exploring' back in my day too." Memories carried her off for a short moment. Those had been _really_ good times. Why had she stopped? Oh, right. The drama.

She cleared her throat, skipping herself off Memory Lane. "Ken's pretty… _special_. I imagine he wouldn't mind being with another male." She had seen him take off with a log before. She had been laughing herself silly even as she had been horrified at the log's expense. Later on, after he was done, she learned a wooper had been hiding itself in the log, and it ran away crying.

She had felt like a total loser after that.

Haward was staring at his paws in his lap. "I don't like _that_ Ken either."

When the epiphany hit her, it nearly knocked her off her chair.

_Her big brother's quilava wanted to mate with him._

Oh, Arceus, _no_.

Then she heard sniffling.

Oh, Arceus, _no_. She had just made her big brother's quilava cry. If Ken came back and saw that…

She wouldn't be invited to Christmas.

Haward lifted a paw and wiped away at a trail of fiery tears. "I know he'll never l-love me like I love h-him, but… I still feel it! And, if I were b-big and aggress-sive like a typhlosion, I'd h-hurt him. I know I would. B-because…" He sucked in a deep breath and looked up at her. She saw every ounce of courage it took for him to do so. "I want him. When we're sleeping together, sometimes… I-I kiss him."

Slowly, she reached out. He shied away, as if he thought she was going to hurt him. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him and brought him into her lap, holding him close.

"It's okay. You can cry. Just cry it all out, it's okay."

Okay, Haward _loved_ her big brother. That changed a few things. That changed everything! She wasn't sure how Ken would feel about his quilava loving him in _that_ way, but she knew he would take it better than if Haward told him he wanted him to mate with him, no strings attached.

Well, of course they would be strings attached. They lived together, learned together. It would be kind of impossible to separate them by now and she wasn't too keen on watching them break apart.

Haward cried into her breasts. Each tear burned like acid, but she let it happen, knowing that she would look pretty indecent by the time he would be done with his fiery tears burning her clothes. The pain didn't go away, though, no matter how she held herself against it. And, with his heart wrenching sobs and her own agony, she cried with him.

This happened to be what Ken came home to, and she couldn't stop the tears from flowing at his pale, horrified face.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" He dropped his bags and charged towards them. "Talk to me, please? Fi? Haward?"

"I-I-I'm alright," she managed to whisper, a migraine building in the back of her head from the repressed discomfort of holding a fire-type, not-entirely-in-control-of-itself quilava. "H-he just got me going…"

He took her word for it, though there was still concern in his eyes as he took Haward from her lap and held him against his chest.

She wrapped her arms over herself so he wouldn't notice the real reason for her tears. He was going to find out soon enough if Haward kept crying on him.

Then, bitterly, she remembered that Ken was the only person Haward would never burn. That _sucked_.

"Haward, do you want to talk about it?"

Haward looked up once. She wasn't sure if Ken could understand the dozens of emotions that clouded Haward's red gaze, but she knew it startled him.

Then, weakly, Haward shook his head. "Christmas spirit," he croaked. "It got to me."

Ken obviously didn't believe him, but he didn't pressure him either. One thing he must have learned from his classes of mischievous children was that, eventually, the guilty would reveal themselves and their petty crimes if he pretended not to notice they had done anything bad.

At least, that was what she had seen in his class. Once those kids were in someone else's class, there was no admitting to who stuck the wad of gum on the teacher's desk.

"Since you two are so moved by the holiday," Ken suggested in a warm voice, going with their lie for now, "why don't you two help me wrap the presents I got for my students?"

Without any fight in them, they went to work.

She carried the burden of Haward's love on her shoulders as she looked over once and saw Haward leaning into Ken's side, a distant look in his eyes.

If friendship could help level up a pokémon, what did unrequited love do?

Most likely, it brought the pokémon's level down.

:::

Christmas day was spectacular!

She spent the first half of it over at her own house, gifts going around to her pokémon, giving them all equal parts affection. She would admit to having favorites, but when all of their faces lit up, she just couldn't get enough of any of them.

There was her vaporeon Vy, then Ken the quagsire by her side, being amazingly affectionate and even protective towards her and the two eggs curled against her side – two things she should have recognized as signs of impending fatherhood sooner – , Aqua the blastoise, Dale the totodile, Kyle the wingull, and Rush the marshtop.

They managed to drag her into the basement pool and swimming with them was like a stress reliever all its own from the holiday fever. Vy was off in one corner of the basement in a nest of blankets and shirts she had stolen from around the house. She pushed her lullaby-singing ball back and forth, eyes at half mast. Ken had settled down on the edge of her nest, having been slapped away by her tail enough times for even _him_ to know he wasn't allowed to get any closer. He had already eaten his toy, like she had known he would, so she had made sure to get him something edible.

Blastoise was happy with the waterproof paint she had gotten him and was making messy scribbles on his shell, or, at least, Dale was at his command. Rush was on the sidelines, laughing as he mastered his new yo-yo.

Kyle was upstairs in the swing she had gotten him, taking a nap.

Close to the time she had promised to be over at her big brother's house, Aqua and Dale fought her leaving, trying to block her exit back upstairs. Aqua was big enough to give her pause, but she cheated and used his pokéball to call him back. Dale had, showing great wisdom for his age, retreated to the pool, far out of her way, and had pouted as she had left.

Well, the offer still stood that they could come over.

A few minutes late, she trotted up to her big brother's door, a beautiful snowfall distracting her on the way.

She swung the door open, quietly shut it behind her, and followed the Christmas Carols to her big brother's bedroom. The good smelling food was spread out on the kitchen table, untouched, and she knew Haward would be giving her dirty looks for making them wait before digging in.

He had most likely slaved over Christmas dinner at Ken's side, though she had helped with a _few_ of the dishes…

She peeked into her big brother's room before slipping in. Okay…

This wasn't what she expected.

A CD player was belting out _Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Stantler_, while her big brother and Haward were on the bed, passed out cold. Ken had claimed center this time and Haward had migrated up the bed to replace the pillows. And Ken had always had a habit of holding onto his pillows like they were security blankets in his sleep.

She stepped back out of the room.

Christmas could wait, she decided. They looked like they needed the rest.

:::

She knocked on the front door.

Rocking back on her heels, arms secretively behind her back, she waited, grinning like a lunatic as she hummed tunelessly to herself.

The door opened and her confused big brother stood before her. "Since when do you knock?"

"Happy birthday!" She shoved a brightly wrapped box into his hands and shoved him back inside. "That was part one of my gift."

"Oh?" He looked down at the box. "Where's part two, then?"

"No, the knocking was part one. This is part two."

Haward padded into the living room, a spatula with a custom-made handle in one paw and his new blue apron on with it. "Hello, Fi."

"Hey, Haward." She patted his head on the way into the kitchen.

It had been five months since he had admitted his feelings about her big brother to her. Neither of them had spoken up of it again, but… it was still there, hanging in the air like the obvious secret it was. And it was so painfully obvious, now that she had been opened to the possibility of it.

Haward may never have said anything to Ken of his feelings, but his actions, how he revolved his whole world around Ken, should have made it painfully clear. It wasn't the, 'I love my master because my master is the greatest' kind of love, it was the 'My master has my heart and soul in his hands and I would do anything to keep him safe and happy'.

One was deeper than the other.

Frowning, she wondered, for a very small moment, if this could explain how Aqua acted around her.

… Most likely not. His was definitely the 'I love my master because my master is the greatest' kind of love.

"I wonder what it could be," Ken was saying with far less enthusiasm than she would have liked, weighing the box in his hands. "It's heavy," he shook it, "but not fragile. Is it a… book?"

"Well, Mr. Coalson, you'll have to open it and find out, won't you?" She shared a mysterious grin with Haward, who was smoking the slightest bit in anticipation. "_We_ worked very hard on your gift, thank you very much."

Ken's head snapped up. "We?" His eyes went from her to Haward and then focused on the quilava. "I thought you said cooking my favorite breakfast was your gift."

"That was part one," Haward countered smartly. "This is part two."

"Your counting lessons have paid off," she chirped. Then she laughed as Haward gave her his most threatening glare. "Just open it already, would you? The suspense is killing me!"

"It's making me nervous too," Haward seconded.

"Alright, alright…" Looking a bit more excited now, he sat down at the kitchen table, having them following him in, and tore into the bright blue and red wrapping paper. At the sight of an actual cardboard box, he rolled his eyes towards her.

"What?" She smirked. "It's not a crime that the box is too big."

Shaking his head he opened the box and leaned over to see what was inside.

She turned her eyes away, feeling inexplicably nervous. This was a present she had never thought she would be able to give her big brother.

She focused on the stove. There were two pots on it, something smelling delicious, and she studied the silvery shine of the ironware for a moment. When the silence stretched on, she focused on the electric stove itself. It had coils that retained heat instead of using actual flames to cook food with. It wasn't as quick as a regular stove, but, then again, if her big brother had a regular stove, even with Haward at his side, he most likely would never use it. Haward was the only thing flaming he let himself get close to and she hadn't even heard the full story on that yet, now that she thought about it.

One day, she left. Another day she came back. Ken went from being completely terrified of a cyndaquil to teaching a cyndaquil named Haward how to read. There was a fairytale in there come true that neither Ken nor Haward seemed keen on telling her.

Then, finally, her big brother whispered, "My _Arceus_. It's a family album."

She released a breath she hadn't even been realizing she was holding. "Yeah, big brother, it is. It's from the, um, the time we all went on that picnic, remember?"

That had been on the first good day of spring and they had all gone to the nearest park to eat under the shade of a budding tree. Even her pokémon had agreed to come, though they had been noticeably weary of Haward.

It had been the day she had finally realized why none of her pokémon ever wanted to go to Ken's anymore – yes, it was indeed about Haward, but it was because of something Haward was doing on _purpose_. The whole time her water-types were in sight, Haward was rubbing himself against Ken's side, glaring at them.

And then, when Ken wasn't looking, he went to the opposite side of the tree they were leaning against so Ken wouldn't see him marking it as his territory.

Sneaky, possessive little Haward.

Other than that, though, it had been a great day. Better than that, even, since she had brought along a new camera she had gotten. It had been supposed to be used to catch pokémon wildlife, but… Well. She had thought that day more precious.

And then, with the mounds of pictures she had taken, Haward in the car with her when she went to go pick them up, a wonderful, dangerous idea had come to her.

"Hey, Haward?" she had said, drawing the quilava's attention away from the smiling face of Ken in one of the numerous photos. "Let's make my big brother his first ever family album."

Because their family had never been anything worth taking pictures of. Even their mother, who had cared for them, had never truly _loved_ them. Or, if she had, her love for them had been easily overpowered by the love she had had for their dad. If their dad wanted to beat his son or try to control his daughter, she had never said a word against it, had even made excuses for him. Their dad…

Self-explanatory.

This, though, _this_ was a family they could take pride in: her six water pokémon and his fire-type and each other… This was a good family.

Then, with another camera, Haward had secretively taken pictures of Ken at school with his students. When they had gotten those pictures back, they had sorted through all of them, deciding which ones were keepers and which ones had to go.

Haward had, when he had thought she wasn't looking, snuck a picture of Ken away from the pile. She hadn't said anything about it.

Ken laughed as he got to the section labeled, in big, goofy calligraphy, SCHOOL ROCKS!

"When did this happen…" It was a rhetorical question, though, because he didn't give them time to answer as he continued to flip through the pages of pictures of him interacting with his students, some of the students posing as Haward had let them in on the plan. One little girl had made a banner saying I 'HEART', and it was the literal, one-point-two-bumps heat, MR. COLSON.

"She spelled my name wrong," he choked out, still grinning. His eyes were unusually shiny.

Vy had her two kits at her belly, a proud quagsire leaning over them, giving the camera a peace sign in another photo. That had been a few weeks back before she had given the kits to trainers that she trusted.

In another picture, Aqua had one thick arm slung around her shoulders and was trying his best to smile for the camera as she laughed herself silly at his attempt.

She looked out of the corner of her eye at Haward. He was beginning to blow steam the closer Ken came to the end.

"You'll really like the last picture," she foretold cheekily, and Haward erupted into flames, burning through the ties of his apron so that it fell to the ground. He glared at his hind paws.

She had never been prouder of her big brother when he didn't even flinch at the sight of fire in the corner of his eye.

And then, second to last page, one picture had been enlarged to fit one whole sleeve. It was of her and her big brother only, taken in secret by one of her pokémon at her home. Ken had fallen asleep on the couch beside her during a horror movie marathon. Haward, for the sanity of her own pokémon, had stayed at his own place, though she had known that he was most likely blowing off a lot of angry steam over there by himself.

With him deeply unconscious, she had slung an arm around his shoulders, grinned at the camera Aqua was not so steadily holding, and had used the three-finger sign for 'I love you', with thumb, pointer finger, and pinkie extended.

Ken laughed and sobbed at the same time as he saw this at a slightly skewed angle. Just as Aqua had been taking the picture, the camera had started to fall out of his paws.

Then he flipped to the last picture.

It had been one that she had taken of him and Haward… while they were asleep. When Haward first saw it, he had tried to burn it to a crisp. It had taken a lot of persuasion on her part to stop him.

Ken was passed out on his bed, turned sideways in the center of it, and Haward was his living, breathing pillow. Ken had one arm wrapped under Haward, the other hand on his chest while his head lied on his belly, and he had the softest, slightest smile on his lips. Haward had curled around his head, a paw on Ken's forehead, and looked as peaceful as he had when he had been a cyndaquil.

Ken stared at it for the longest of times. Then, slowly, he looked to them. Neither of them could directly meet his gaze. It was just… too embarrassing! She shuffled her feet and Haward glared at a spot on the floor.

"I'm going to hug both of you," Ken said, "and then we're going to eat the breakfast Haward made. And then I'm going up to my room, with this family album, to cry in peace. Is that understood?"

If she hadn't known that he was going to cry for joy, it wouldn't have been. Since she did, however, she nodded slowly. Haward seemed more hesitant, most likely not wanting Ken to cry alone for any reason, but, at Ken's steady, watery look, he nodded too.

"Good." Ken ran a shaky hand over his eyes, upsetting his reading glasses. "Now, let's eat!"


	3. Typhlosion the Lover

It was her birthday.

Grinning, laughing, she stumbled out of her living room, about to pee herself if she watched Aqua and Haward glare each other down for even another second. Aqua was grumbling something she couldn't understand and Haward was saying something back that Aqua obviously didn't like, but, somehow, she just couldn't get how serious the situation was for how _ridiculous_ it was!

Aqua was big enough to step on Haward for Arceus sake!

She raced for the stairs, still laughing, when someone knocked on the front door.

"Uh, crap! J-just hold on a minute!" She stood there for a moment in indecision, shuffling from one foot to another.

"Do you need me to get it, Fi?" her big brother called from the living room. Unlike her, he didn't see anything funny about the situation and she could hear the stress in his voice. Most likely, he was trying to calm Haward down before there was a full-fledged war in her home.

She weighed the pros and cons of him leaving the 'heated argument', as she believed it was, unattended except for a large group of water pokémon who were most likely very fed up with Haward bullying them.

"No, I'll get it." Cursing to herself, she waddled to the front door, thinking she would just open it, say a quick hello, come in, make yourself at home, and then make a mad dash to the bathroom faster than a ponyta ever could.

The doorknob turned and she stared up into the aged, rugged face of a man she had wished on every shooting star she had ever seen since she had turned eighteen to never meet again.

"Hey… dad…." Suddenly, she didn't have to pee.

Life had been so good, she thought sourly to herself. She hadn't seen him since the birthday he had tried to force Haward on her. How long ago had that been? Four, five years now? Looking at him now, it felt like yesterday, and yesterday was far too close for her liking.

The argument in the living room died down to mute. Her pokémon knew what this meant, Aqua more than any of them, as he had faced the cruelty of her dad before she had been old enough to escape him.

More than that, though, Ken knew, and Ken was here and Ken had Haward and Haward _didn't_ know. Haward had known their dad long enough to be told that she was his new master and she and Ken, as a rule, did not talk about their dad anymore than necessary.

"Happy birthday, baby girl." He smiled and tried to pull her into a hug.

Swiftly, she sidestepped it. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here for my little girl's birthday," he said matter-of-factly, as if he had always been a good enough father to come to every good thing in her life. Maybe that had made him a good enough father, that he hadn't come. Every good thing turned bad the moment he was a part of it.

"I don't want you at my birthday." And, as quickly and with as much strength as she could muster, she tried to slam the door shut on him.

But their dad, he had always been a big, muscular guy. Even as old as he was, he was as fit as a fighting pokémon. Before she could manage the lock, he had already twisted the knob enough for him to shoulder the door open with a mighty push.

It caught her by surprise and the doorknob smacked her hand against her hip as the slab of wood coming straight towards her sent her bouncing on her butt.

With a slight yelp of surprise from herself, their dad stood in the doorway, looking not so happy anymore and more like the hot-tempered man he really was.

"BLASTOISE!" The ground shook as Aqua _ran_ to her defense, crouching protectively over her with twin rocket cannons raised towards her dad.

Her dad scowled in disgust at the water-type. "Alright, baby girl, where's the fire pokémon I gave you?" His eyes lit up. "He turned out to be strong, right?"

"Just FYI," she growled, "water-types are one of a fire-types greatest weaknesses. Not the other way around."

His expression was stormy. "Not if you train them right and make their flames hot enough. Where is the pokémon I got you? Has it evolved? Have you used it in battle?" His head shot up suddenly. The disgust in his face returned tenfold. "Oh. It's you." Then he looked down and the childish joy was back. "Look at you…. You've evolved into quite the quilava, haven't you?"

She looked around Aqua to see her big brother and Haward standing in the doorway. Haward looked confused, going between Ken's pale, drawn face to her fallen form, Aqua obviously in protective mode against this man who was their father.

Haward did the smartest thing he could have done. "Qui? Va? Lava?" He twisted his head towards Aqua as if looking for an answer before looking back into the living room towards her other water pokémon. She was able to catch a glimpse of them and knew that, if Aqua somehow failed to protect her, there would be five other pokémon rushing to her aide.

"Haward, go back into the living room," Ken whispered, voice cracking. "Fi and I need to have a talk with our father."

"And who do you think _you_ are," their dad growled, "to order around your sister's pokémon?"

The silence was deafening.

Then she cleared her throat. She pushed one hand against Aqua's hard shell, letting him know she needed up, and he offered her a paw that she gratefully took. She leaned back against him, feeling a familiar tremor work throughout her body.

Their dad had never hurt her, unlike Ken. But she had still always been afraid of him. Maybe it was because, whenever she had done something wrong, he had turned his anger on her big brother. Or, maybe it was because, after their mom died, he started to look at her weird. He had never touched her in strange places, but there would be times when she would hear the door open while she was in the shower and she would close her eyes tightly because a cold draft would signify that someone had moved the curtains.

This man absolutely terrified her, and she put a hand flat against Aqua's hard underbelly, feeling the bone-like ridges and scars and taking some comfort from it.

"And who are _you_," she growled back as best as she could, voice trembling, "to try and tell _him_ what to do with _his_ pokémon?"

"He doesn't have pokémon!" Then he actually looked at who Haward was standing with, and it wasn't with her.

Their dad's eyes moved to her with the glittering intensity of a blade made from diamonds. "You… _gave_ a fire-type pokémon to that sick little boy?"

"I _gave_ a fire-type pokémon to my big brother!"

"Fi, Fi, let me handle this." Ken stepped forward, drawing their dad's attention to him.

At 'sick little boy', the confusion had melted away and Haward took that step with him, red eyes narrowed in absolute burning fury as his pores began to spew smoke and then, after a moment, blazing flames that were definitely higher than usual.

"No, this is my birthday, and I get to do what I want on my birthday!" Her voice rose without her meaning to. She swallowed thickly. "Just let me protect you this time, big brother." Her hands were shaking, a cold sweat breaking out over her skin and she clenched her fists on the wetness. "That's my birthday wish."

Before he could deny her, and she knew he was going to, their dad spoke up.

"Baby girl," his voice was low and dangerous, "do you want to know why everyone at school was _really_ making fun of him? Why I _really_ never considered him my son?"

"Don't," Ken bit out, looking panicked. "Don't tell her. You promised me that if I did what you wanted me to do, you would never tell her!"

But there was a cruel smile on their dad's lips that told her that all promises were forgotten in that moment. "Baby girl, your 'big brother', the man you adore, is –"

"Arceus, _don't_," Ken cried out.

"A _fag_."

Ken sucked in a deep breath and closed his eyes, shaking.

She just stood there, shocked beyond anything else. She looked down at Haward first, who was back to looking confused. She bet he had never heard that word before, and, clearing her throat again, she explained it to him.

"A 'fag' is, um, an offensive term for someone who's gay." First there was hope in his red eyes.

Then absolute fury. Because he knew what an _offensive term_ was and that most likely did not settle well with him.

"Quiiii…" Haward gritted his teeth.

She looked up into her big brother's pale, withdrawn face. "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

Ken jerked, as if that wasn't the response he had expected. "W-what?"

"You could have told me you were gay! Arceus, you're standing there, acting like the world's about to end. It's not a bad thing, I swear. I mean, when I was younger, I had a few girlfriends and that was great."

He opened one eye first. "You… did?"

"Yeah!"

"Why didn't _you_ ever tell _me_, then?" he whispered, almost brokenly.

"It never occurred to me to," she whispered back. "You were going through that phase where I couldn't even joke about my sex life with you, so I just never talked about it with you. I mean, _come on_, you've been scared of your sexuality all these years?"

"I want to get back to that part where you said you had a few girlfriends," her dad snarled as he slammed the door shut behind him.

Suddenly, she had a very angry man in her face, hands on her shoulders, shaking her. "You filthy little whore!" their dad roared. He raised a hand up high, palm facing her, and her mind went blank with fear.

"BLASTOISE!" Aqua roared back, using the brunt weight of one cannon to throw her dad to the side.

"NO!" Ken yelled out a second later, then nearly fell limp when he realized she wasn't in danger anymore.

Kyle flapped in from his swing and aimed his beak at her dad's face, going in for a vengeful pecking, before her dad raised a hand, caught the small flyer in his palm, and slammed Kyle to the ground.

She stopped breathing as Kyle stopped moving.

"If you want a pokémon battle, then, _fine_," their dad snarled.

"K-Kyle?" she whispered. The bird tweeted weakly in response.

"This is going too far!" And then Ken leaped forward and he grabbed their dad by the throat and he _lifted him up_. There was rage in his expression. "You're going to leave _right now_ before we call the cops on you. That's pokémon abuse as well as breaking and entering and physical assault. Get. _Out_."

Haward was at his heels, growling to reinforce the command, fire spewing from his back and Mohawk.

"Who do you think you are, you little _cocksucker_? Don't touch me! You make me _sick_. The fact that you came from my seed makes me want to throw up every time I look at you." He shoved Ken back.

Ken, though tall and broad shouldered, was not nearly as strong as their dad. He had never gone to self-defense classes, never hit the gym, and only exercised enough to keep himself fit and healthy. It wasn't till Haward came into his life that he put any extra effort into it, and that was only to tire Haward out.

Their dad, though, hit the gym regularly. Always had, for as long as she could remember. One time, she had seen him challenge a hitmonchan and _win_.

If it came down to a physical fight between father and son, she had no doubt who would win, no matter how determined Ken was not to lose.

"Just go," she added on weakly, hoping that, somehow, her words would be more powerful and knowing they wouldn't be. She knew self-defense. On the road, she had had to learn it the hard way. She knew various forms of martial arts and she had used them before.

But this was the monster in the closet, the nightmare that wouldn't go away. Every little girl's fear, and this one was hers. She was four years old again, watching their dad backhand Ken across their small apartment kitchen. Four years old were too small to protect their big brothers… Four year olds were too small to…

Aqua huffed as he took a heavy, intimidating step forward. "Blastoise," he ground out, glaring at their dad. He wasn't the little squirtle her dad had tried to take away when she had been a preteen.

She stole a deep breath. And she wasn't four years old either.

"I want you to leave and never come back," she said more sternly. "Or my _family_ will gladly escort you out."

Vy had weaved herself into the fray and had grabbed the weak and confused Kyle in her mouth. Just as sneakily, she had retreated and Kyle was now out of the way as Dale, Vy, Rush, and Ken stood in the entranceway to the living room, looking fit to fight.

Their dad gave her a weird look, as if he thought she had lost her mind. And then his hand went into his pocket where there were round little forms just visible.

This was going to turn into a battle and she wasn't entirely sure if she was ready for one in the mental state she was in.

"We're not battling here!" Ken reached out, shoved as well as he could to turn their dad towards the door, and tried to push him towards it.

Their dad sidestepped, catching Ken off balance as he was suddenly leaning against nothing, and then caught him in a chokehold as he stumbled forward.

"No!" she screamed.

It was out of the corner of her eye that she saw Haward breathing heavily, eyes going as wide as saucers. And then his mouth opened, sharp teeth, and the sound that emerged was definitely _not_ a quilava roar, but something much larger and something much more threatening. "LET HIM GO!"

The last thing she saw before a bright light enveloped her house was her dad's shocked face.

Something reached out of the light and hit their dad with a powerful headbutt, sending him flying into the door and wrenching him away from Ken. Ken dropped to one knee, coughing, touching his sore throat and wheezing.

She ran to his side and wrapped her arms protectively around him as the pokémon who had headbutted their dad stepped in front of them, side by side with Aqua and actually towering over the blastoise by six, seven inches. An arc of flames danced across the nape of the pokémon's neck, rising viciously higher till she thought the flames would burn down her house.

It was a typhlosion. _He_ was a typhlosion. Haward had evolved.

And he was _furious_.

"Get. _Out_." He took a step towards their dad, who appeared too enthralled by the speaking fire-type to realize the danger he was in. "Now."

Their dad didn't respond for a long time, long enough that she thought Haward was going to barbeque him. Then he slid up the door, blindly reached out for the door knob, opened the door, and… left.

Without a word or even a backwards glance.

Haward got down on all fours and stalked him all the way to his car, making sure that he left. He stayed on the curb till the small car disappeared from sight.

It was only once she couldn't hear the car anymore that she moved, and it was only to pull Ken tighter to her.

Ken was just breathing in her arms, not crying, not sobbing, not screaming, just a force of quiet strength. His arms came around her. "It's okay, Fi. He's gone now."

How could _he_ say that? Wasn't she supposed to be the brave one now? Wasn't she supposed to be the one calming him down? Then why was she the one crying on him? Why was she cold and shaky? She released a keening wail of defeat and then sank her head into his shoulder.

She felt more than heard Haward come back to the house. His heat radiated, a sign of how angry he still was. The heat hurt, she didn't want it, and she cried harder into Ken's shoulder as he rocked her back and forth.

"Blast…" She was lifted away from her big brother into stubby, thick arms.

"Aqua, wait," her big brother's voice called.

"He knows what he's doing," came Haward's voice. It was deeper now, rougher, more mature and confident. "He's going to take her swimming."

Sure enough, they were heading towards the basement. Rush picked up Kyle and they and Dale, Vy, and Ken followed after them.

"Let's go home and leave them to it," was the last she heard of Haward.

Ken's unsteady reply was, "Okay."

It was, by the far, the greatest and worst birthday she had ever had.

:::

The next few days were busy. Not only because Ken had decided that they would give her birthday a second try, but also because he now had a typhlosion in his house. Typhlosions were reasonably larger than quilavas and that meant making a few changes.

"He's still going to sleep in my bed with me," Ken pointed out lightly. "But I'm thinking we might get an outhouse."

Haward's face screwed up into one of disdain. "Hah hah. You think you're funny, don't you?"

Ken swatted him away with a small smile.

She felt happy watching this like this. With a hum, she pulled out a loosely wrapped brown paper package from behind her back. "Here, Haward. I thought you would need this now that you're too big for your old apron."

"But we're still doing your birthday…" When she merely glared at him, Haward obediently took the package and shuffled into the living room. She and Ken followed after him.

"We haven't been cooking much, so there wasn't any urgent need to get him another apron," Ken reasoned. "But, thank you anyway."

She smiled coyly. "What are little sisters for?"

Loud, barking laughter erupted from the typhlosion, the bag on the floor and a black apron in his paws.

Ken gave her a weary look before reading what was on the apron's front.

_Eat the cook_

At the end of it, a small pursing kiss was apparent, except the red dripped off of them like blood and there were fangs peeking out from under the top lip.

Ken spun back towards her. "Fi!"

"Big brother!" She patted his shoulder. "Don't worry about it. I mean, look at Haward. He's loving it!" He had already slipped the neck ring on and was holding the two ties out for someone to do them up for him.

Seeing as how Ken didn't want to get near the apron, she tied them for Haward and grinned at the large smirk on his long face.

"You know, if you go to the pokémart in that, you will _really_ freak some people out."

Haward growled appreciatively at the thought.

"Oh, no you don't! Haward, don't do that to innocent bystanders. It isn't right." Ken crossed his arms over his chest, looking for the world like the stern teacher he failed to be at school.

Haward's ears pressed flat against his skull.

She hid her grin behind her hand. Oh, yeah. He was pouting. And Ken could never say no to Haward's pout. Or, at least, he wasn't able to when he was a cyndaquil or quilava. She rolled her eyes to study her big brother's expression.

It definitely appeared that he couldn't say no to the typhlosion either and his shoulders slumped in defeat. "You can wear it _once_, okay?"

Haward grinned, showing off rows of sharp teeth that were definitely more intimidating than they had been.

She reveled in Haward's victory with him for a moment.

Then, unexpectedly, she dropped the pokéball. "So, big brother, what kind of guys do you like?"

Two male heads swung in her direction so fast and hard, she heard both their necks crack.

"W-what? What kind of question is that?" Ken asked. Haward was glaring at her, silently commanding her to shut up before he was forced to maim her.

"It's a sisterly question. I can't help you find the guy of your dreams if I don't have a clue what I'm looking for." Secretly, she was hoping the guy of her big brother's dreams was the one standing next to him.

Even though he wasn't technically a _guy_. He was definitely male, though.

Ken flushed darkly. "The school administration would drop me if they knew I had a boyfriend, Fi."

"You have tenure, so don't you dare try to pull that one on me." She walked around both of them and went upstairs, thinking that, if they had this conversation in his bedroom, Ken would be more comfortable.

Behind her, she heard the reluctant footsteps of her big brother and the heavier paws of Haward stalking after her.

"It's something I've tried not to think about," Ken clarified.

"Then think about it now," she shot back.

"He doesn't have to," Haward defended. On all fours, he turned his head up towards Ken. "You don't have to."

Ken struggled for a moment. She could see the fight in his eyes. Then he sighed and rested a hand between Haward's shoulders. "It's okay, Haward. She's not going to leave me alone till she has an answer."

"I can make her leave you alone," Haward added desperately.

Ken glowered at him. "No, you can't. It's okay, really. It's just… type-talking." He grimaced.

"Yeah, just type-talking," she repeated. "Like, my types big." She thought about that for a second. "In more ways than one," she added cunningly. "Or, if it's a girl, I like them smaller than me."

"In more ways than one, am I right?" Ken guessed sourly. She grinned and that was answer enough for him as he sighed and flopped back onto the bed. Haward climbed in after him, purposely shoving his body against hers and nearly sending her over the edge of the mattress. Now that he was bigger, there was hardly any room for a third person with both males stretched out, and Haward was obviously angry enough with her to not care to try and fit her in.

Ken hadn't noticed, though, as he had closed his eyes in thought, so, to be spiteful, she simply sat down on Haward's hind legs and refused to be thrown as they moved and jerked beneath her.

"Stop moving around so much, you two," Ken snapped. "I'm trying to concentrate."

Haward immediately went still and she grinned, victorious.

"I suppose he has to be good with kids," Ken eventually muttered. "And…"

"He has to be strong…" she prompted.

Haward looked back at her with wide eyes.

"He doesn't _have_ to be strong," Ken grumbled. "He can't be a coward, though. Arceus knows I wouldn't be able to live with a man who hid behind me."

Haward was starting to catch on as to why she was doing this. It wasn't to get Ken to go out into the world and start looking for the guy of his dreams, it was to see if maybe the _male_ of his dreams was already nearby. He looked back at her with fear and hope in his eyes, wisely not saying a word as to not disturb Ken.

"How about intelligence-wise?" she asked.

"I wouldn't want to have a conversation with a slowpoke if that's what you mean. I suppose, intelligence-wise, he would have to know his stuff." He shifted, getting more comfortable in creating his dream partner. "He'd have to be as tall as me or taller. I don't want to have to bend down."

Haward was roughly eye-to-forehead with Ken. So far, so good.

"This is just ridiculous, Fi," Ken interrupted himself. "I don't want to have to think about this."

"You're thinking about it anyway. How about sex?"

Haward shuddered beneath her. "I can kick her out whenever you want," he told Ken, voice low and husky.

"She'll just come back with force." Ken sighed. There was a definite blush to his ears and nose. "I don't know, Fi. I've never… Well. When one's gay and one doesn't want to admit it and also can't lie with a woman, there's a _lack_ of experience."

Her big brother was a virgin. That was… surprising. Because, Arceus knows, she had heard enough about how gorgeous her big brother was when she went to his college graduation. Some of his graduating class had come up to her and asked her for his phone number, seeing as how he hadn't been the type to just hand it out. Others had tried to wheedle information from her.

None of them had succeeded, of course.

"Well, then, we'll just leave that box blank," she assured him.

"As your big brother, that shouldn't even be a question."

"I'm looking at this from a friend's point-of-view instead of a sibling's. What kind of eyes do you see when you think of the perfect male for you."

His eyebrows scrunched together. "I see…"

His entire face was painted red as he jerked out of bed and ran for the adjoining bathroom. The door slammed shut behind him and locked.

"Just go home, Fi!" he yelled through the door.

She blinked befuddled eyes at Haward, who, after a moment of confusion, glared at her.

"He knows I'm just going to keep bothering him till he tells me." He had already said as much.

Haward just growled at her. She had definitely pushed her luck.

Looking back into the bedroom, though, watching Haward trying to sneak up on the bathroom, she knew she didn't feel bad about it. Ken had realized something about himself.

Hopefully, it would be something involving Haward.

:::

She got two phone calls in one day.

The first was a friend calling her, asking for her water-type expertise a few towns over. He told her she might be stuck there for a few days, a week at most, but it was important.

So she agreed.

The second call was her brother. There were two things wrong with that:

One, they lived right next door to each other. She didn't even _know_ her big brother's phone number for the fact alone that, even mortally wounded, she could crawl to his doorstep or yell and he would be at her side like a lightning bolt.

Two, he didn't use the video phone. So, instead of seeing him, all she could do was listen to his soft voice asking her in a low, desperate way to not drop by the house for a bit. He needed some time to think about… things.

She told him about the trip, feeling every word roll off her tongue with a sort of fear in her belly.

His reply was short. "Oh. Well then, be safe."

And then he had cut off the connection.

She had wanted to go over to his house immediately, but he had asked her not to and she wanted to respect that. Just this once, anyhow. Besides, it wasn't like he was alone. He hadn't said anything about Haward leaving the house, so…

Yeah, she had been pretty sure that he would be safe.

That happened to be three and half weeks ago, because, her friend, the idiot that he was, had ended up doing some screwy things that concluded in her longer stay away from home. The whole time, she had refrained from calling Ken, feeling nervous and out of her mind the entire time.

Her pokémon had been the only things keeping her calm as she awaited the day she could barge back into his house and bother him once again. It had been all she had been able to think about, even long into the nights as sleep evaded her.

She had almost regretted asking Ken his type. Then, with a steely will, she refused to. Ken had already gone so long without thinking about it, she hadn't wanted him to go the rest of his life alone! She was his little sister, she was allowed to look to his future happiness…

Didn't she owe him that little bit, at least?

It was with wheels on fire that she raced back home. In a fashion that she was becoming familiar with, she barged into his house before even touching her own doorstep.

She was about to howl "I'M BACK!" to announce herself…

Except a keening wail overrode her deep inhale and stole the air from her lungs. She knew that sound… That was a _sex_ sound. That was… like… not something she needed to hear in her big brother's house.

She stumbled for the door, her immediate thought being that she could always come back later.

Randomly, a fact she had learned when she had been a young trainer flew through her mind. _Mating season for fire-type pokémon takes place during late winter, early spring so that the newborn eggs will have the benefit of hatching midsummer when it is usually hottest…_

Oh, Arceus, it was the beginning of February.

She heard another embarrassingly high-pitched cry. A feral roar made her heart stop.

She remembered vividly Haward telling her that, if he was a typhlosion, he wouldn't be able to stop himself.

This was bad. This was so bad!

She charged up the stairs. "KEN! HAWARD?"

There was a yelp of confusion as she swung open the bedroom door.

"Oh, ARCEUS!" she screamed. "MY _EYES_!"

"What are you _doing_ in here?" Ken cried out, and then grunted.

She seriously did not want to know why. In the single glimpse she had caught, she had seen more than she would have wanted to, enough to give her nightmares, no doubt.

Haward's animalistic growls made her peek, though, and her heart leaped into her throat as she met ravenous scarlet eyes. The arc of pores along the nape of neck were spewing flames high enough to make her nervous but she seemed the only one concerned by it as her big brother wrapped both his arms around Haward's shoulders and pulled his upper body up to press his mouth against the typhlosion's ear.

She couldn't hear what he whispered, but she could see it calm down the lust-crazed pokémon.

If her big brother was a victim, she concluded hastily, he was a happy one. And she didn't need to be here to see this.

"I-I'm gonna… go now. A-and, um… Yeah. You two seem to know what your dick – doing. Doing. Yeah, doing." Crap, she needed to stop saying that. "Later!"

If she holed herself up in her house till the reported end of the fire-type mating season, that was no one's business but her own.

:::

"We really only have you to thank," Ken shot abruptly into the awkward silence. "Thanks, Fi, for everything."

She still wasn't quite ready to meet his eyes, seeing as it had taken two more days after the fire-type mating season was cooling down for her to actually come over again. This time, she had knocked, rather quietly at that, hoping they wouldn't hear and she could run away again.

Sadly, that hadn't been the case, and she had never dreaded more being in the company of her big brother than she did just then.

"I have no clue what you're talking about," she squeaked.

"If it hadn't been for you," he clarified slowly, finding great interest in the coffee table, "Haward and I… wouldn't be where we are."

She didn't want to know where Haward was, she didn't want to know where Haward was, she didn't want to know where Haward was, she didn't want to know where Haward was…

"Where _is_ Haward?" she asked, mentally cursing herself.

"Sleeping."

It was on the tip of her tongue to make an innuendo, but… The conversation was already awkward enough. She shifted on the cough and cleared her throat. "So, uh, how did _that_ romance begin? Did his mating instincts come on and everything just spilled out afterwards?" She winced.

That didn't come out the way she meant it to.

And _that_ didn't sound right either! Someone, just shut her up!

Ken obviously agreed because his face turned red. "Actually… it began before his mating season."

"Tell me about it."

"When you asked me whose eyes I saw," he admitted slowly, hesitated, and then carefully continued, "I saw his. That unnerved me. Even in pokémon years, I'm still robbing the cradle!"

"What makes it worse is that you're a teacher," she pointed out and then winced again. Shut up, shut up, shut up…

"Shut up, Fi," her big brother sighed. "Then there was the fact that he's a pokémon. He's not human."

"No, he's not." She said the first smart thing that day. "But he still loves you like a man in love would."

Ken chuckled. "I suppose he does. After you left, we ended up having a very long talk and, when he told me his feelings and I tried to deny him – because he is a very healthy, young male typhlosion, I imagine he could do better than an older human male –, he put me straight on a few details. When I told you we need time to ourselves, it was so we could… test the waters."

"So to speak," she remarked.

"So to speak, yes."

"And… now?"

"I'm not carrying his eggs, if that's what you mean."

"I was going to get to that, but, no. I mean, how do you feel?"

Her big brother smiled at her. It was breathtaking. "I feel as if I could never be happier than I am right now."

"That's good. Great." She reached out and pulled him into a hug. "I love you, big brother. All I want in the world is for you to be happy."

He hugged her back. "You've always made me happy, Fi."

And that… was the happiest she felt she had ever been.

:::

_The End._

_Author's Note: I felt… semi-uncomfortable writing a poképhiliac story, but… I really want to do it at the same time! If you're offended by this material, chances are, you shouldn't be reading it. _


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